Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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