hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Randomize
