I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
The dick lei will go down in squad history
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
