Do you still have your period?
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
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