We need to rekindle our bromance
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
