Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
did i just pee glitter
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
