Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize