I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
