Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
