I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I look excited, but its just a facade.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
