who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
