Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
