I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
