He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
