we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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