I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
