Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
