i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
