I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
North Korea, Best Korea!
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
