I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
