One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize