awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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