I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Randomize
