I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Randomize
