I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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