help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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