It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
