Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
