somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
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