Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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