So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Randomize
