i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
false alarm. still invincible.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize
