Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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