Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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