Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
