lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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