Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I hate your face
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
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