we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
