it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
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