they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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