after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
