maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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