4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
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