Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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