i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
