I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
