pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
