we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
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