his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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