i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
